Wednesday, August 19, 2009

the start of the Accidental Caregiver

I would never have chosen to be a caregiver (that's why people go into nursing, isn't it??) . I would not have referred to myself as a caregiver. But my mom has been living with us for ten months now and I have to admit that yes, I am a caregiver.

Accidental: happening by chance or accident; not planned; unexpected (

From my favorite verse in the Bible (Psalm 62.12)
" One thing God has spoken, two things have I heard: that you, O God, are strong, and that you, O Lord, are loving..."

Because God is strong and loving, He doesn't let things happen to us be chance. He loves me; He cares about me; He is aware of what is going on. He hasn't missed something or let something slip by. My new role as a caregiver is not by chance or accident. It has happened out of God's love for me.

But it IS unplanned and unexpected...hence the birth of "the accidental caregiver". To be honest, I was going to title this "the reluctant caregiver", but that felt discouraging and I truly do not want to be reluctant in this role. Then I thought of calling it "the barefoot caregiver", after "the barefoot contessa" - to give it a witty and elegant sound - but I don't feel witty and elegant, and even more importantly, I was afraid no one would "get it".

So, why a blog? My purposes are initially self-serving:

1. Being a caregiver is hard! I think this blog will help me sort through my thoughts and feelings so that, in turn, I can learn, grow and change.

2. If this blog turns out to be amazing, then it can become a book, then a movie...

3. Maybe it will help others - if I let others read it! - and provide a connection with other caregivers.


  1. Anne, remember me, Viviana Purrinos/Bermude I'm from Miami. I was looking through facebook and came across your blog. I am also taking care of my parents, who live with me now for the last 2 years. My dad has vascular dementia, and my mom could not take care of him by herself. I can understand so much of what you are sharing in your blog and even helps me to connect with you in this caregiver role. I saw the pictures of your kids in facebook. They are so gorgeous and grown up! Say hi to Doug. Love, Viviana

  2. Viviana! Of course I remember you! So glad you wrote - I just noticed the comment today (this "blog" thing is still new). You are exactly the person I was hoping to connect with through this. Let's keep in touch....