Friday, September 11, 2009

it's a lie!

Who said that you can do it all?

I know that I've heard that. I even believed it. I think it came from the 60's and the womens lib movement, where it started innocently enough. It was meant to help women (and girls like me) realize that you are capable of doing more than just keep a house clean. Get an education! Have a career! Raise a family! Yes, by golly, you can do it all!

And somewhere along the way, I decided that "do it all" literally meant "do it all". Like everything...all the time...often at the same time. And while I never quite got down that keeping a house clean part, I have worked really hard on the everything else part - until now. I've finally come to my senses.

Maybe someone out there...some superwoman...really can "do it all". But I am not that person. And I'm okay with that. I'm finally understanding that you have to make choices. You can not keep adding things on to your life, especially when your life is already full, without taking something off.

For example, I added the PTA treasurer position to my list of responsibilities [for those of you who have heard the stories of my college days, where I would switch banks every few months because I couldn't balance my checkbook and thought a fresh start was the answer, you can laugh now], so I resigned from the EESAC committee at school. (well, I tried to resign - they didn't take my resignation- they're desperate, that school!) That was a good start.

After almost a year of trying, I now know that no matter how hard you work at it, you simply cannot fit 48 hours worth of activities into a 24 hour period. The resulting stress in my life, not to mention how it made everyone else in my family feel, was not worth it. So I looked at my options, evaluating what responsibilities could go and would couldn't (let's see.... I think I'll keep my husband, children, mom, friends...). So last week I decided to resign from my job - my dream job - the real lawyer job with a great boss who let me work part-time. I hadn't told anyone other than my husband about this decision(who was quite supportive of this decision, by the way - I wonder why???). Maybe I was still hoping, somehow, to do it all. But I did tell my boss (who was also quite supportive - again, I wonder why??) And he found someone to replace me! Already! I met her today; she's perfect for the job. And the surprising thing, I feel even better about my decision. The job was a wonderful opportunity for me, and it will be the same for her. I'm happy for her...and for me. A few years ago I would not be able to say that; I would have fought with myself to (1) keep the job and/or (2) not feel like a loser because I couldn't do it all. To be honest here, I probably couldn't have said this a few months ago. But I can now...God's timing is good, and I'm grateful that He is always at work in my heart.

Maybe one day I'll get another opportunity like that, who knows? But what's important to me is knowing that I didn't fail - I made a choice.

1 comment:

  1. I'm all ears. Besides that, I love reading whatever you write, so I'm looking forward to this!