Friday, April 16, 2010

not one to bloviate

Thought for the day: balance is overrated.

You can hardly pick up a magazine without reading admonitions for balance in our lives. There's a myriad of articles espousing the need for parity between work/play, children/spouse, family/friends, others/self, to name a few. Now honestly, where is this elusive balance supposed to be found?

It has been 2 months since my last blog posting. And why is that, you ask? Does this mean that caretaking nirvana has been achieved? That I simply do not need to "blog" anymore? Call Oprah! Call Dr. Phil! Alas....that is not the reason. In search of this balance, I've erroneously thought that if I simply focus on other things and sort of ignore "it", caretaking would find it's rightful, harmonious place in my life. How wrong was I!

I find caretaking permeates everything. Everything. Unless I am away - like far away, like out of town away - I always feel the responsibility. And in my heart of hearts, I still have not come to terms with this. While I have my shining moments of exemplary service(okay, some, at least in my mind) it is a daily struggle to "do it all". Mom is one person, one aspect of responsibility if you will. But she seems to require far more than her alloted percentage of my thoughts, time and energy - at least as defined by me!

So my ongoing personal quest is to look for each day to have it's own balance, as defined by God (not me); to trust that God will help me meet Mom's needs while not missing out (or neglecting) other people and aspects of life.

And what's this about bloviate? I just liked the word! At first glance, I thought it was a cow-related word. (Bloviate/Boviate/Bovine - see the similarity?) But the definition of bloviate is to speak or write in a pompous manner. Well, I'm certainly not one to bloviate!

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